~~Cast~~
Kaen
Miki
Kitten
Alli
Agent
UCE president (UCEp)

~~Act 1, Scene 1~~ *in Cairo*
*Kaen sleeps on the couch*
*Miki sits across from him*

*Kaen looks up from the couch:*
Kaen: Who are you and what are you doing in my apartment?!!

Miki: Hi, I'm Miki. How are you feeling, kid?

*Kaen produces a gun:*
Kaen: What are you doing in my apartment!!!

Miki: I was supposed to keep gaurd, remember?!

Kaen: Oh, yeah. I sorta remember. *Carefully unloads gun* Ok, so how do I join The Rebels?

Miki: Sssh! Are you nuts? There are probably cameras in your apartment, do you want to be found?

Kaen: The UCE has already got enough on me to charge for disloyalty, so it's only a matter of time before they cart me away. Besides, if there are cameras, you're already screwed because they would recognise you.

Miki: Oh, right. No, wait! I remember: they scan their vidoes for keywords, and only watch them if they have 'em, so be careful.

Kaen: Yeah, right, like they're gonna go through the trouble of breaking into my apartment, installing an expensive camera, then check for keywords like "rebel." There are a ton of reasons to say "The Rebels." They'd haveta watch all the vidoes practically, and then consider all the cameras they have up legally and you think they're gonna bother with my home? So what if I say "rebels"?

Miki: You did it again! Are you trying to get us killed? Stop saying "rebels." ACK! You made me say it!

Kaen: Big deal. It's been 5 minutes since the first time I said it and they haven't come to get us.

Miki: Well, it doesn't happen that fast--

Kaen: I can imagine with all the vidoes they have to check. I can say "rebels" or "kill the UCE president."

Miki: STOP IT!!!

Kaen: Or maybe "Crush the UCE" or "I'm gonna join the rebels"--

Miki: Stop saying you're gonna JOIN the REBELS!!!

Kaen: At this rate they won't need a camera, they can just ask the neighbors.

Miki: You're right, we've gotta leave!

Kaen: But someone is suppsed to meet us here. Can't we just get on with the initiation?

Miki: Right, we've got to warn Kitten.

Kaen: Kitten?!? A rebel leader in my house?! Why don't you just call Dreamer over and we'll ALL have a party before we're captured!!!

Miki: You're the one saying we won't get caught Mr. I Can Say Whatever I Want."

Kaen: Look, is Kitten coming or not?

Miki: Yes, he should be here in a minute.

Kaen: Well if you guys are so irresponsible I don't know if I want to join you after all. What were you supposed to gaurd me from, anyway?

Miki: From saying anything stupid.

~~Act 1, Scene 2~~
*Kaen, Miki, and Kitten(male) in Kaen's living room*

Kitten: So, this was after he pointed a gun at you?

Miki: Yes, then he said the key word.

Kaen: So he's still got the gun pointed at you.

Miki: Well, no, the gun's on the counter now.

Kitten: That means you left something out. I told you not to leave anythign out. How did the gun get from him to the counter.

Miki: He set it there.

Kitten: Then he said all the keyword stuff?

Miki&Kaen: Yes.

Kitten: Well, now you've done it. Com on, let's go.

Kaen: Go? What for? I thought I was going to be initiated.

Kitten: Now you have to wait. We've got to leave now, or they'll come for us.

Kaen: Who's they?

Kitten: They anyone. You've put us in danger, now we have to leave.

Kaen: Leave where?

Kitten: London. Come on, no time for chit chat.

Kaen: London? Why London?

Kitten: Because London isn't Cairo. The UCE will be looking for you here in Cairo.

Kaen: Considering they're the United Council of Earth, I think they'll be lookign for me everywhere.

Kitten: Then we have to go nowhere.

Kaen: Nowhere?!

Miki: Is that possible?

Kaen: If we try to go nowhere, we'll just end up here! Isn't there an underground or something?

Miki: That's a good ide; we'll take you to the Underground.

Kaen: What?!

Miki: But they think we're painters--

Kitten: So now you're our new student.

Kaen: But I can't even draw!

Kitten: That's why you're our student. Welcome to The Rebels.

~~Act 1, Scene 3~~

Miki: We're there.

Kaen: Where?

Kitten: Here.

Kaen: Here where?

Kitten: In London.

Kaen: London?! I thought we were going to the Underground!

Miki: Sssh!

Kitten: We are underground, that's why it's so dark.

Kaen: Usually underground means a secret operation.

Miki: We won't be secret very long if you keep anouncing us to the whole world.

Kaen: I hardly think the whole world is underground.

Kitten: That's precisely why we're here.

*lights come on*
*enter Allisina*

Allie: Hey, Kitten, why'd you have the lights off?

Kitten: The lights are always off at night so everyone can sleep.

Allie: Not with the racket you're making. Besides, it's the middle of the day.

Kitten: Hmm...

Miki: Aren't the UCE gonna be looking for us around noon?

Kitten: My watch is broken.

*enter UCE agent*

Agent: Hi, we're looking for this man, have you seen him?

Miki: It's hard to tell; I don't see in black and white most of the time.

Allie: A lot of people look like that.

Agent: Hey, that looks like him...

Kitten: Where?

Miki: Here.

Agent: There.

Kitten: Don't start that again.

Agent: I'm sure that's him, asleep in the corner. *points at Kaen*

Allie: Poor thing, you should let him sleep here.

Miki: Yes, he's really tired.

Kitten: We walked all teh way from Cairo.

Agent: Cairo? Then I'd better take him in.

Allie: No, wait--

*exit agent and Kaen*

Miki: Now we've got to rescue him.

Kitten: After we eat lunch.

~~Act 2, Scene 1~~
*Kaen alone in a small, white room*

Kaen: Great. Locked in. With little chance of rescue. I mean, I hope I'm rescued, but The Rebels don't seem that organized to me. That is if they even want to rescue me. It'll take awhile to pick this lock, but that's ok: I have plenty of time.
You know, if I get out I'm gonna create some kinda haveck. No one locks me up and stays sane through it. I could crash their computers, at least, I could try. I could try'n let other captives out, or let The Rebels in. I could anounce the UCE's secrets to the entire world, that would create lots of haveck. Or I could jsut evaluate the UCE president and declare him crazy. I'm a therapist, wouldn't my word hold up in court? And then the whole UCE would crumble. At least, I hope it would.

~~Act 2, Scene 2~~
*Kitten, Miki, and Allisina in a park*

Allie: Well, that's the last of the picnic.

Miki: Yeah, we should blend into the crowd--

Kitten: In order to enter the UCE headquarters.

Miki: --oh, right...

Allie: We could pretend to be reporters, in support of the UCE of course.

Miki: Why don't we think of these things sooner?

Kitten: Get your clipboards and let's go.

Miki: Yes, into the crowd.

*walk into audience, walk back out*

Allie: Oh, there's the building.

Miki: Looks like the right one.

*Kitten knocks*
*note: split stage- half office*
*UCE Agent opens door*

Allie: Hi, we're reporters. See? Clipboards.

Agent: Just because you have clipboards doens't make you reporters.

Miki: Hang on, let me write that down...

Agent: Uh, most reporters make appointments. Do you have an appointment?

Allie: We're too important to make appointments.

Agent: Oh?

Kitten: If you pay attention to the movies, all the important people drop by unexpected.

Agent: Yeah, but so do the spys. You aren't spys, are you?

Miki: Of course not. If we were spys, we would have run away when you said we might be spys. That's also in the movies.

Allie: You should really watch more movies.

Kitten: You should also let us in, we're very busy--

Miki: And we want to know how organized the UCE is. We've heard you're very organized and we like that idea.

Agent: Oh, ok. *lets them in*

~~Act 2, Scene 3~~
*Kaen stepping out of room*

Kaen: I'll just walk out the exit. *note: exit in plain, VERY plain site* Or, well... I know I should just want out but it's too tempting... I have to try... *exits opposite of exit sign(s)*

~~Act 3, Scene 1~~
*Allie, Kitten, Miki, and Agent walkign down hall*

Agent: Um, why are you looking in all the rooms?

Allie: *opening a door:* We want to see where everything is... so we know how neat you are.

Agent: But--

Miki: And so we don't get lost, we hate getting lost.

Agent: Um, I think everyone does.

Kitten: Then why are you complaining?

Agent: Here in the UCE we have a strong chain of command and- are you getting this down?

Miki: Yes, "Here at the UCE we have a strong chain of daisies--"

Allie: Really? Where?

Kitten: Daisies?

Agent: No! Chain of commanders--

Allie: That's gotta be hard--

Miki: All stacked up like that.

Agent: Command! Strong chain of command! Did you lose something?

Kitten: *examining floor* No. Do you have any trap doors?

Agent: Trap doors?!

Allie: They're very dangerous.

Agent: Are you sure you're not spys?

Miki: Why, is there something secret to spy on?

Agent: No- it's just- don't open that door! And, uh, don't mind any muffled voices you might hear such as, uh, "Help!" or "Let me out!"

Miki: This door? *opens it*

Agent: YES that door!! Hey... it's empty...

Kitten: Maybe that's why it wasn't locked.

Agent: Excuse me, I have to call someone... *exit*

Kitten: I'll go left, you go right.

Miki&Allie: Ok.

*exuent*

~~Act 3, Scene 2~~
*sirens, Kaen, and the UCE president*

UCEp: What are the sirens for?

Kaen: Obviously someone escaped.

*enter Allie and Miki*

Allie: Kaen!

Kaen: Um, Allie. Hi Miki.

Miki: *to offstage*KITTEN!!!

UCEp: Kitten? Who is she?

Kaen: He.

Miki: It.

Allie: Miki!

Miki: Allie!

Kaen: Right. As I was saying, The Rebels really think the government should be more about the people.

UCEp: Not about the central government?

Kaen: Nope, the people.

UCEp: Oh, ok, I'll do that then. Anything else?

Miki: You know that whole thing about buying hotdogs vesus buying hotdog buns? Well--

Allie: You WILL?!

Kaen: Yes, we had a nice talk.

UCEp: At least now you won't be trying to kill me.

*enter Kitten*

Allie&Miki&Kaen: Kitten!

Kitten: *pulls out gun* The President!

UCEp: I have a name you know.

Kaen: And he's agreed to fix the UCE.

UCEp: Hi, I'm Fred, nice to meet you.

Kitten: He WHAT?!? You can't just walk in here and convince him he's wrong: he's evil!

UCEp: Hey! I resent that!

Kaen: Well, I did. We had a wonderful talk and he's agreed.

Miki: I'll take that. *takes Kitten's gun*

Kitten: Hey!

Miki: Well, it's over. No need to fight anymore. Aren't you happy?

Kitten: But... that was too easy...

Allie: Yes, isn't it wonderful?

UCEp: I'll get on the changes right away. Come on, follow me.

Allie: *to Kitten* Who knew he'd be so nice?

*exuent*

~~Act 3, Scene 2~~
*A big computer room, with Fred at a computer and the rest arguing*

Miki: Wow, you must have a real confrontation problem, Kitten, wanting to just blow away such a nice guy instead of asking him--

Kitten: Well, I didn't see you go up and convince him!

Kaen: I did.

Kitten: Shut up! IF anyone has a confrontation problem it's all of us.

Kaen: Except me.

Kitten: I said shut up.

Allie: I was wondering though--

Kitten: How in the world could you be that stupid Kaen?!

Kaen: But I saved everyone!

Allie: You're supposed to jsut save yourself.

Miki: Well that's boring.

Kaen: Isn't anyone paying attention?! I saved us from certain death!

Miki: Not certain death, but certainly death.

Kitten: How dare you endanger us all like that!

Kaen: Miki, I don't think he HAS a confrontation problem.

Miki: Hey! You're right!

Alli: What?

Miki: You're cured, Kitten! You just confronted Kaen.

Kitten: I was never sick!

Miki: Well, you aren't anymore.

Allie: He might explode if you make him mad enough...

Kaen: Yes, he's turning red.

Miki: A rose is a rose
But the theory now goes
That an apple's a rose--
I guess that means you're a rose, Kitten; you're as red as an apple.

*Kitten advances towards Miki*

Miki: Here kitty kitty kitty... AH!

*Kitten chases Miki*

UCEp: Ok, I'm done.

Allie: Done already?

UCEp: Yep. Gee, I hope we're not locked in.

*Kaen and Miki produce a crash or three*

Miki: Nice Kitty--

Kaen: I wonder if I get a medal.

Allie: Nope.

UCEp: At least, not until we undo the lock...

*fade out*