Don't you just want to scream?

With all those people staring at you, who could place blame on you. You didn't pick this assignment, this wasn't your bright idea. You just nodded at the teacher and wrote the speach, and now you have risen to deliver it. A few other people have to do this too, and most already have. Your name in a hat has decided your place in line, and now here you stand. Now here you stand, staring at words on a paper your mouth is supposed to say. You've already done all the thinking, and you know you should just speak what's on the card. Say what you have to say. But all those people are staring at you, and you don't know what to do to turn your brain off, make it stop shouting louder than the silence. You can't scream, just as you can't speak, because your throat is dry and your heart is racing.

Don't you just want to run off-stage?

You're so young, who could place the blame on you? You didn't even pick this school, this crowd waiting anxiously for those cards to form words and run away out of your mouth. But if you speak, you'll scream. Some demon inside you whispers this, and tells you they are watching. Almost every eye is on you. You know they mean no aminosity, but it is difficult to resist that part of you that says they do. Wait, look closer; their eyes are full of pity. The front row shifts recklessly in their seats, urging you with their minds to go on. But you don't want to say it, say anything in front of this crowd. You take a step back, tears threatening to finalyl wet your throat.

Don't you just want to cry?

There would be no one left to blame you; they would dissolve into the puddles in front of your eyes. You didn't pick to be you. Who put you in this body, in this life? It certainly wasn't your choice. Perhaps you just nodded as if to say ok. You've dropped your cards. When did that happen? Now they lay dissembled on the floor; they must have made a loud noise, what with all the silence for an amplifier. The words can't leap from the pages that far away. Your mind is not blank. If only it were, to make room for the words that you were assigned to say in front of this large group. No one would have blamed you to say no, but you nodded and wrote a speach. You take another step back, lower your blushing face, and SCREAM. The tears come, and you run off stage. Who's idea was this anyway?

Nice job. Try again tomorrow.